quinta-feira, 22 de setembro de 2011

As piadas mais inapropriadas do 'Roast of Charlie Sheen'

  • “You’re just like Bruce Willis — you were big in the 80s and now your old slot is being filled by Ashton Kutcher.” — Amy Schumer

  • “The only reason you got on TV in the first place is because God hates Michael J. Fox.” — Anthony Jeselnik

  • “Brooke Mueller is not very bright unless Charlie throws a lamp at her. … Mike Tyson, your opponents spent more time bleeding in the corner than Charlie’s ex wives.” — Jeffrey Ross

  • “Charlie, you claim to have ‘tiger blood,’ but after all the porn stars you’ve [had sex with], it’s probably Tiger Woods’ blood.” — Seth MacFarlane

  • “If you’re winning, this must not be a child custody hearing. The only time your kids get to see you is in reruns — don’t you want to live to see their first 12 steps?” — Jeffrey Ross

  • “Charlie still hasn’t hit rock bottom. He’s looking forward to it though, because he thinks there’s a rock there.” — Steve O

  • “Charlie Sheen is still alive! Charlie, you were amazing in Platoon.Your marriage to Denise [Richards] was kind of like her Vietnam because she was constantly afraid of being killed by Charlie … There’s no denying how famous you are. It was international news when you ruined the lives of those two girls living with you—you know, your daughters.” – Amy Schumer

  • “Mike Tyson, your opponents spent less time bleeding in the corner than Charlie’s ex-wives.” — Jeffrey Ross

  • “Charlie Sheen called his boss on Two and a Half Men a ‘Jew ki**’ and expected to go back to work. That’s crazy. If you could do that and keep your job, then everybody would do it.” — Anthony Jeselnik

  • Fonte: ScreenJunkies

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